Saturday, October 5, 2024

 Levi: Weston! That’s rude! Only I can say that, because I’m the youngest. 

and

“Of all the things that taste like chicken, eggs are not one of them”. 

Wednesday, July 31, 2024

Beach volleyball is my favorite Olympic sport. I was watching with Levi when the cameraman got a close up of the woman’s behind in her little bikini bottom. 

Levi: woah. 

Me: It’s like they are only interested in covering their butthole. 

Levi: Well it also covers her front no-no square. 

Saturday, July 27, 2024

 Scene at a garage sale-

Levi: Excuse me? How much is this platypus?

Lady: That’s a duck! And he’s $7. If you squeeze him he quacks. See? *quack* If it quacks, it’s a duck. 

Levi: I can quack. Does that make me a duck? 

*walks away quacking*

 I decided to introduce Weston and Dallin to “The Sixth Sense” today. 

Five minutes into the movie-

Dallin: So he’s dead. 

Five minutes later-

Dallin: So he’s a ghost?

Five minutes later-

Dallin: So he sees dead people?

Text to Dallin: SHUT UP YOU ARE SPOILING THE ENDING FOR WESTON!

End of movie-

Weston: HE WAS DEAD THE WHOLE TIME?!?! 🤯🤯🤯

 Adventures in teaching someone on the autism spectrum to cook:

On the menu- Linguine and white clam sauce. (All the boys’ favorite)

Me: we need to get the pasta started first, because the sauce comes together really quick. 

Weston gets a large pot, fills it with hot water, and puts it on the stove. I get out a smaller pot for the sauce and put it on the other burner, hand him the recipe, and start gathering ingredients. 

Weston: I just put the butter in the pot?

Me: yep. It’s a simple recipe. Just dump all the ingredients in the pot and stir. 

Weston then drops a stick of butter into the pot of boiling pasta water. 

🤦‍♀️

We argued for a minute about who was at fault here; the mom who assumed the boy had some common sense, or the boy who takes everything literally. 🤷‍♀️

I managed to get most of the butter out of the boiling water and into the OTHER POT and Weston went on to make a delicious dinner.

 Dallin: When I kiss a girl, I'm going to do it like this- (makes fish face)

Robin: I see you inherited romance skills from your father... 

Thursday, April 11, 2024

Mom: Daddy was afraid of girls when he was in high school. 

Dallin: Is that why you are in charge of this house? Dad is scared of you?