From 20212-

The boys came to visit me at the hospital 

Weston: Welcome to the world Levi!

Dallin: *points at my stomach* when is the other one coming out?

Me: Good morning sweetheart. Do you want me to make you something special for breakfast before practice?

Dallin: How many times do I have to tell you?? I DON'T EAT BEFORE WRESTLING PRACTICE!

   

Levi: If our species was the dude from donkey Kong, what do you think we’d hear at crowded events?

Me: I’m pretty sure all those words were in English, but my brain has no idea what you just said. 

Me: I love that bumper sticker. “Tell your dog I said hi”. We should get you one for you that says, “Tell your cat I said pspspsps”. 

Weston: I never say pspspsps. 

Me: Most people say that to cats. 

Weston: You don’t say it to cats. 

Me: Fine. We will get you a sticker that says “tell your cat I said Hello little floozywoozyfluffywuffykittywitty.”

Weston: yes! 

Or 

Weston: I need a birthday gift for my friend. 

Me: I got him a shirt that says, “Let’s have a moment of science” and it has beakers and science-y stuff on it. 

Weston: why is that funny?

Me: Because the original saying is, “let’s have a moment of silence”. It’s a pun. 

Weston: Okay but why would anyone want a shirt for a gift? 

Me: it’s not just a shirt. It’s a funny shirt. And when you wear it, people read it and smile because it’s funny. 

Weston: thats dumb.

Me: How about the shirt and his favorite candy?

Weston: Fine. 

 I’m lying in bed, high on pain pills, from having surgery this morning. I get a text from Dallin that says “I need new wrestling shoes before my wrestling meet tomorrow”.

 New recipe for dinner. Levi called it “divorce me chicken”. 

 Weston and Dallin are sitting on the couch together comparing their favorite rap songs and introducing each other to new bands they might light. I think I might be in the twilight zone.