After giving Weston a cupcake-

Mom: Do you like it when mom surprises you with treats like that?

Weston: I would prefer a surprise trip to Australia. 

I come downstairs and Levi (who is potty training) is running around with no underwear on. 

Me: Levi, does the kitty like to play with things that dangle?

Levi: yes

Me: Then don't you think you should put some underwear on? 

D just poked his head in the back door: Mom! Weston just pushed the self-destruct button on the house!