W vs. Mama

W: That girl calls her Mama, "Mommy". 

W vs. conversations with internal organs

W is sipping his hot chocolate and Mike hears him whisper something to himself.  


Mike: What did you say, W?
W: I was just telling my tummy that it is called hot chocolate.

Mom vs. What??

W: Why does orange juice burn eggs?
Mom: WHAT??
W: Why does orange juice burn eggs?
Mom: W, I have no idea what you are talking about.  Orange juice does not burn eggs!
W: YES IT DOES!!

D vs. saving his cookie

I gave D a piece of a cookie.  When W spotted it he dropped to his knees and crawled after D saying "omm omm" and trying to bite his cookie.  
D ran off shrieking with glee. 

W vs. Things that suck

W: Does the vacuum suck, mama?




Me: .....  ......yes. 

W vs. parenting

And then sometimes I DO like having my parenting mirrored back to me.  Recently, W has been complementing me on the strangest things.

We were making cookies and as I dropped spoonfuls of cookie dough on the cookie sheet W says "Good job, mama!"

As I was cooking dinner the other night W came running through the kitchen and paused to say, "Good job turning on those lights, mama".  (I assume he was talking about the lights under the microwave.)

and when he saw his dinner plate:
"Thank you for giving me a roll, mama. "

Dad vs. Comprehension

W threw a tantrum in church on Sunday when he dropped his packet of fruit snacks. Mike quickly picked them up and put them back in the bag and W calmed down.  
Mike's response to W: (hushed for church) Next time don't jump to conclusions!
Me to Mike: (hushed for church) Good job keeping it on a 3 year-old level. 

D vs. dinner

D got out of his high chair, summoned me out of my dinner chair and marched into the kitchen to point up at the toaster.  Which means, of course, he wants a waffle.  I said, "No, go eat your dinner".  


There was much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.  

D vs. peas

D has a pile of peas on his tray that he is not eating.  Dad scoops up a bite on his fork and puts it up to D's mouth.  D smacks the fork and the peas go flying.  Dad scoops up another bite of peas and puts it up to D's mouth.  D smacks the fork and the peas go flying.  


Someone is not learning his lesson here and it's not D. 

mom vs. a complement

I got the nicest complement from my husband. Someone saw his desktop family picture and said "your wife is pretty". Mike said, "Thanks! She's funny, too!" 

W vs. questions

Overheard:


W to Daddy:  Daddy, why does the dinner on tomorrow???


Me: (chuckle) Yeah Daddy, WHY???


Dad: Because.... when you put a bean in water it will start to sprout.  Then you can plant it and grow a bean stalk. 

D vs. ketchup

D is dipping his hand in his ketchup and rubbing it on his hands like it is lotion. 

W vs. preschool

W's preschool teacher:  I finally figured out how to get W to stop eating crayons. I only give him markers. 

W vs. the snack

Me: What is this white stuff all over the table???
Weston: (not looking up from his maze book) It's parmesan cheese. 
Me: So.... while mommy and daddy where taking a nap, you had parmesan cheese for a snack?
Weston: (still not looking up from his book) Yes. 

D vs. sippy cups

Why aren't my "spill-proof" cups "D" proof??